Social Media has a wonderful way of introducing brilliant creatives and Angelique was one of them. I connected with her at first by commenting on her weekly ‘Insecure’ post found in her stories every Sunday. She became my ‘Insecure’ watch buddy in my head. Eventually, she released her first blog post for her blog, ‘A Word’. As I read it, I became intrigued, not just at the relatable topic but her ability to take a topic and say everything you were thinking within the topic without fear, pulling at your emotions and making you want more. It’s like she was in your head and you were having a conversation with your older sister who always said the right things at the right times. As she continued to post, I became more and more captivated by her journey.

How are you handling 2020 so far? A: 2020 has been one of the most challenging years for me! We’re only halfway through it but I’ve learned so much about my own resilience in this short but trying time.

What got you into writing? A: I’ve been writing for as long as I can remember. My mother taught me to read and write at a very young age and even as a toddler I was amazed at the way stories were told. I always knew I’d be holding the pen, telling my own story one day.

What has been your hardest piece to write so far and why? A: So far, ‘Sad Girl’ has been the hardest. Not necessarily to write, but to release. It’s not only a part of my story but my mother and grandmother’s story as well. I was so worried about how they’d feel about my interpretation.

What writer inspires you? A: I can’t say that I have one specific writer that inspires me, truthfully. I’m inspired by all those brave enough to share their story or stories of others with the world.

Why the name ‘A Word’? A: I named my brand ‘A Word’ because that’s truly all it takes. One single word can spark various emotions, can bring you back to a specific time or push you toward the future.

You went and graduated from college. Congratulations girl! How was that experience? A: Thanks so much! Honestly, graduating college was a surreal experience and I don’t think I’ve really had the time to embrace it. I was so focused on finishing and once I finished I focused on pursuing my passion.

In one of your posts, you talked about feeling stuck after college. How did you get over that hump and how are you doing now? A: Yeah, it was hard because I felt the weight of the constant “what now” questions? And I honestly had no clue. I didn’t have a plan. I’d say I’m finally finding my footing now. I still know nothing about where I am but I definitely know where I’m going.

What is your advice to college kids on getting through it? A: My advice would be to find your own way. No one path will be the same but each is special. My journey was full of comparisons to others and I think that’s part of why I struggled. I didn’t embrace my own path and tried to follow someone else’s. Do what works for you.

Your post titled, ‘Sad Girl’ was one of my favorites you ever wrote. You spoke about the fact that you don’t have to be strong all the time. Why do you think people have this notation that they can’t break down or lose it, that they have to have everything together women especially? A: I wrote that piece for women but black women in particular because society puts such a heavyweight on our shoulders and yet we’re expected to be put together and be the “backbone” of our community. And at the end of the day, a lot of our “strength” comes from survival. We’re not always okay, we don’t have all of the answers and we can be strong and still need support.

How does one break that cycle in your opinion? A: I believe it starts with a conversation. We come from such a “hush-hush” background where the struggles within the community aren’t discussed because we have enough issues. But in order to resolve these issues, we have to go to their source and dig up the roots.

Your latest piece, ‘Blocked Blessings’ has become another one of my favorites. You touch on allowing yourself to be vulnerable. What do you think it is about being Vulnerable that scares most people? A: I think the exposure that comes with being vulnerable is what scares people the most. No one wants to be hurt, disappointed, or misjudged. As humans, we avoid that as often as possible. But that avoidance can ultimately be our downfall. We never know what we would’ve been exposed to had we taken the chance.

What is one blessing you feel like you blocked because you couldn’t be Vulnerable? A: I’ve always been overly cautious when it comes to putting myself in uncomfortable positions. Uncomfortable not necessarily meaning negative but stepping out of my comfort zone. There were jobs I knew I was perfect for that I never applied for because I doubted my abilities or was afraid of someone else’s perception of my abilities. I’m learning to let go. If the worst-case scenario is that I fail, then that’s okay with me.

How do you deal with Vulnerability now? A: I just accept that what is for me is already mine. I’m still very cautious in my decisions but I look at every possible outcome as a stepping stone. There’s no decision that can affect me negatively if it’s a part of my journey.

Visit her blog and follow her on Instagram & Twitter as well.

See the full spread in issue 42 online + print.

Some good news for your Thursday! Demi Lovato is engaged to her boyfriend, Max Ehrich and I couldn’t be more excited.

The singer showed off her beach engagement photos (captured by a friend hiding behind rocks) and an absolutely stunning ring on her Instagram feed. “When I was a little girl, my birth dad always called me his ‘little partner’ – something that might’ve sounded strange without his Southern cowboy like accent,” she wrote in the caption. “To me it made perfect sense. And today that word makes perfect sense again but today I’m officially going to be someone else’s partner.”

And then she had some very sweet words for her husband-to-be. “I knew I loved you the moment I met you,” she said. “It was something I can’t describe to anyone who hasn’t experienced it firsthand but luckily you did too.. I’ve never felt so unconditionally loved by someone in my life (other than my parents) flaws and all. You never pressure me to be anything other than myself. And you make me want to be the best version of myself. I’m honored to accept your hand in marriage. I love you more than a caption could express but I’m ecstatic to start a family and life with you. I love you forever my baby. My partner. Here’s to our future!!!! 😩😭❤️🥰😍”

They made their relationship publicly official in the video for Justin Bieber and Ariana Grande’s song “Stuck With U.” this year.

Ehrich also posted about Lovato on his own feed. “Ahhhh 💍😭🥳💓 You are every love song, every film, every lyric, every poem, everything I could ever dream of and then some in a partner in life,” he wrote. “Words cannot express how infinitely in love with you I am forever and always and then some. I cannot spend another second of my time here on Earth without the miracle of having you as my wife. here’s to forever baby 💍 ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh jeuejfjqjweuvu I’m so excited 😭😭😭 you are the most beautiful inside and out in the entire world & I couldn’t be more grateful God brought us together 🥳❤️ 🙃💍💍💍😭I LOVE YOU SO MUCH @ddlovato AND WILL FOREVER CHERISH YOUR PURE, BEAUTIFUL, INFINITE SOUL.”

I can’t wait for the wedding. She’s going to look amazing and Max is perfect. THANK YOU MAX. The only sneak peek we have seen with Demi in a wedding dress is in her music video for ‘Tell Me You Love Me ‘. Be sure to check out the photos and send your congratulations below.

Farrah Aviva is an artist who splits her time equally in front of the camera as well as behind it. With a 15-year career in the arts, Farrah is one of the most sought after portrait photographers for Public Figures and Social Influencers. She has a lengthy, diverse resume in film/television ranging from acting to directing. Farrah is also the creator of BITE THE BULLET Stories which features celebrities to everyday people sharing their personal stories of struggle with the hopes of helping others in need. Farrah began her career in the arts in New York as a designer and fashion show coordinator. She worked with brands such as Diane Von Furstenberg, Oscar de la Renta, and Paris Hilton. Applying her experience in production with some of fashion’s greatest designers, Farrah began to pursue her photography career while also acting in a variety of film and tv shows such as Lucifer, iZombie, Supernatural, Bates Motel, A Million Little Things, The Professor, and many more.

How has 2020 treated you so far?

In all honesty, it hasn’t been that bad, but of course, like for many, it turned my life upside down and I’m still in the process of sorting it all out. With the speed, everything happened and shut down this year I felt like I had no choice but to embrace it which has been a wonderful experience of letting go and trusting the flow.I received my green card and moved to Los Angeles at the start of 2019 and spent most of that year grinding beyond what was healthy for my physical and mental well-being. I was in the process of opening a new photo studio in a city where no one knew me, and I was dedicating every spare second I had to building BITE THE BULLET Stories. As fulfilling as it was, it was HARD. So when 2020 came I finally felt like all the benefits of that grind were beginning to appear.I suddenly had clients coming in faster than I could keep up with, I paid off my debt that formed from devoting 2 years to BTBS and I signed with a talent agent. Things were good!

Just as I was driving to set to start the first day of a film in March, I got a call that said production had been shut down due to COVID and to turn back.And then shortly after the Canadian/American governments announced the borders were closing.My husband was based in Toronto for work at the time, so I decided not to fight it, and shut everything down in LA and go back to Canada to wait this out with him. I expected to fall to the floor in tears.All the hard work, all the years it took me to get there, gone.But it was actually the biggest relief, and exactly what I was supposed to do.Since then I’ve been going back and forth a bit, but I’ve had a tremendous amount of time to build things in my life that I never would have otherwise.

You created the “Bite The Bullet Stories” movement. Can you share how the movement started and how it evolved up until now?

As with millions of people, the quest for mental wellness has been a life-long journey for me. I’ve seen many of those closest to me – including members of my immediate family- struggle with mental health issues, and the shame that is commonly associated with it. Two years ago I decided to photograph both everyday people and celebrities ‘biting the bullet’ and posted their image with their story of overcoming a personal struggle. Quickly I was inundated with messages from people around the world wishing to take part. Sharing how these stories literally saved their life. The instant and positive impact that I saw it leave on people around the world motivated me to drop everything in order to build the community that it has become to date.

What is the ideal future you have in mind for “Bite The Bullet Stories”?

We’re working towards building it into a global community that celebrates each other’s triumphs while offering coachings, retreats and most importantly community.A lot needs to be done in order to do that properly, but after two years, the foundation for this is almost built.

You are also an amazing photographer. In your opinion, what makes a picture stand out from the rest?

Telling a story within each frame. Whether that be in the subjects eyes, body positioning, wardrobe, and or set dec.For me the point of a photograph is to capture a moment, to tell a story, to make someone connect.

Who are some artists you would love to photograph?

Honestly, I love them all. No matter how famous, or how green. All artists have a special quality to them that I adore so I don’t really have a ‘dream artist’ I’m hoping to photograph one day.Of course, if De Niro, Johnny Depp, or Tilda Swinton asked me for a shoot, I’d probably feel high from the ecstasy of it for years.

What are some things you hope to cross off your bucket list once everything goes back to normal?

When travel is possible again I want to work abroad with animal sanctuaries.I would also love to do a silent retreat, whether that be a zen meditation retreat or a walking retreat in Spain, I love silence and think it would be an incredible experience to sit with it for a week. I also wouldn’t mind working up the courage to do a guided ayahuasca retreat. And maybe live in a small village in France one day. If I only accomplished one or two of those things I’d be very happy!

Who are some artists that inspire you?

Patti Smith and Pablo Picasso are two artists that fill my soul with so much delight. Their stories are incredibly different, but at the root of each is incredible perseverance and authenticity to fulfilling their dreams.The ups and downs they went through, the struggles they had to face and overcome are so inspiring. I highly recommend the books, Loving Picasso, and Life with Picasso which are incredible memoirs written by two women he was involved with at different points in his career.And I also recommend, Just Kids by Patti Smith.I could read those books over and over again.

What are some causes that are dear to your heart and hope to bring awareness to in the future through your platforms?

Through BTBS I’m already bringing awareness to issues around mental health but another cause I’d love to focus on is the environment.It is of utmost importance to me, and I really wish it were for everyone else too.In my humble opinion, if we don’t fix the crisis with global warming, and for some, just admit there is a crisis, then we’re going to lose everything. Everything should come second priority to the environment.We should all be asking ourselves on a daily basis, what else can I do? My husband and I became vegan 3 years ago, and we do everything in our power to reduce the use of plastics.But I still don’t feel like that’s enough.I want to get more involved and help clean the oceans and plant trees.

What is the best advice you have gotten and from whom?

My dad was the first person to introduce me to the power of positive thinking. He gave me a list of books to read. I took his advice and read those books, and it changed my life, simply by changing my thinking. Positive thinking and the power of attraction allows you to rely on yourself and not wait for someone else to provide miracles for you. We all have the power to create them ourselves through our thoughts. It’s quite magical.

What do you hope to achieve through your art?

All I care to do is leave a positive impact on others and this planet. Whether that be through my art, or through my daily interactions with people. That’s my driving force every morning that I wake up.

What is the biggest misconception people have about your job as an artist?

That it is glamorous! Perhaps the film/tv side of it is more glamorous, but the photography side is so much physical exertion that I never feel less glamorous than when I’m in the middle of a shoot. Some photographers seem more capable of keeping a ‘cool’ vibe while they shoot.But for me, and maybe it’s because of my size, I’m lugging gear that’s much heavier and larger than I, crawling on the ground and contorting into weird positions to get the shot, and sweating.At the end of a shoot I feel like half my makeup has been wiped off from having my camera pressed against my face for hours, and I’m hunched over like a 90-year-old woman with back problems.I don’t realize any of this when I’m in the moment. Just when the dreaded words come up, “can we take a selfie together?” That’s when I say pause and run to my makeup bag in an attempt to make myself look human again.

What are your plans for the future?

I’m going to invest more time in FILM/TV again by director-shadowing and expanding my skills that way.Once I can do that, I feel like I’ll be able to blend BTBS, photography and my FILM/TV experience in an incredibly powerful way.

CONNECT

https://www.instagram.com/farrahaviva/?hl=en

When did you fall in love with your voice?

I think I’m still learning to develop a healthy relationship with my voice and there are a lot of areas for improvement. When I was younger, I always thought singing was all about demonstrating skill and belting high notes. Nowadays I think about how I can use my voice to tell a story—and that means showing restraint and making room for the song to grow. Taking lessons with a singer named Jessica Louise this year also really shaped my voice to be more dynamic.

What is it about Jazz that inspires your music? The chord progressions I use are largely inspired by jazz. The first chords I learned on guitar were jazz chords, and that’s what I mainly use to build my songs. My singing style is also influenced by a lot of female jazz vocalists like Melody Gardot, Emilie-Claire Barlow, and Ella Fitzgerald. Improvisation is another aspect of jazz that I can’t overlook in my music. I love making room in my songs for piano fills or a guitar solo to keep the listener engaged.

How was it being a part of an a cappella group in college? It seems so awesome.

I think a cappella has a reputation for being really poppy and theatrical, but it’s actually a really challenging genre! When you’re relying on only human voices to create a full arrangement, everything becomes really volatile. Even though a cappella is really hard, I made a lot of friends in school from the community and gained a lot of experience creating vocal arrangements as my group’s music director. There were so many great singers in my group!

Is it easier or harder to perform a cappella?

Definitely harder! Staying in tune and in time can be a challenge without any instruments, and it takes a lot of rehearsal time and trust in your group members to deliver a good performance. It’s almost the opposite of jazz—where musicians can rehearse 20 minutes before a show and improvise as the song is being performed.

How was it working with Grammy-winning producer Kau Kenyatta and what did you learn?

Kamau is one of the kindest and most open-minded teachers I’ve worked with, and I was really inspired by how he saw beauty in music of all genres. Growing up studying classical music, mistakes and wrong notes were always frowned upon. Kamau taught me to focus on being spontaneous and dynamic in my performance, rather on being perfect. On the technical side, I learned a lot about jazz theory from him. Being in the jazz performance class also taught me how to arrange music for a rhythm section, horns, and vocals.

Your single, ‘Off My Feet’, is such a beautiful and lush track. You have such a soulful voice. What’s the story behind the track?

Thank you! A lot of the lush nature of the song came from the producer Natty Reeves and the keys player Suwon Yim. This song is about how at the start of a relationship, the excitement of something new can often make you lose track of everything else and overlook the red flags. During the time wrote it, I saw myself demoting other priorities like work, family, and friends in order to spend time with someone else. The lyrics are about how all aspects of my life were altered and how I was thrown off my original path.

Can you tell me about your debut album, ‘Voice Memos’?

“Voice Memos” is a set of songs that showcases a bit of all my musical influences. It’s a mix of R&B, Neo-Soul, Jazz, and even the K-pop I grew up listening to. It’s titled “Voice Memos” because all the songs on the album started from a voice memo. I’ve become really awful these past few years at writing everything down, and the voice memos app was what I had used to write all my songs. It’s scheduled to be out on October 16th, 2020. You can pre-save/pre-order the album here!

What was the journey like leading up to this debut?

The journey was definitely not straightforward. After graduating and starting a new full-time job, I thought my relationship with music would come to an end. I woke up in a new city where I had no friends to play music with and as a singer I felt hopeless. I’m fortunate to have made the decision to learn guitar 3 years ago and to rely on myself as the accompanist. This year, because of the lockdown caused by COVID, I decided to spend my time learning how to record and brushed up on some basic production skills. I was lucky to have met a lot of musicians on social media and through mutual friends to help me finish my tracks.

The transitions in your single, ‘Off My Feet’ are so dreamy. Can we expect that on the album?

Thank you! It was a challenge to decide how to make sense of all the different sections of the song, but I think it turned out to be a unique track in the end! You can definitely expect songs that swell throughout the album. There are songs that start out very sparse and grow to be very lush.

What was your favorite song on the album and what was the hardest to record?

I think “Coffee” (the last single of my album) is my favorite song. It’s a song that I produced myself and something that I started working on since 2017. Even though the lyrics are sad, there is a nostalgic and bittersweet undertone in the instrumentation. I also love that there are real drums and an upright bass on the track! I think “Off My Feet” was actually the hardest to record, mostly because some of the chord changes made singing vocal harmonies really challenging.

What have you learned about yourself while making this album?

So much! I’ve learned that there are millions of tiny decisions that go into making a single song. I’ve also learned not to become too attached to parts of a track that were the hardest to create, when and to subtract you need to. Most importantly I’ve learned how to be patient with myself and others. When you worked so hard on something for so long, you start to crave that instant overnight success—but that rarely happens and it takes time to develop your craft and for others to discover/fully connect with your music.

PRE-ORDER THE ALBUM

https://lnk.to/voicememos

CONNECT

https://www.cindyzmusic.com/